Life

Life.  Energy.  Abundance.  

 

Trusting in the Process

Avoiding pain is no way to live.  Especially in the ways of love.   Live it out loud.   Get hurt over and over again.  And trust in the process.  You learn and your heart gets bigger and smarter because of it.

Venice

 

   

City of love.  City of lights.  

City of beautiful romance and earthly delights.

In Bloom

Learning to see the beauty in everything only takes a moment.

 

My life used to be a big adventure.  I would go through these moments where I was doing something absolutely incredible, learning something, doing something, meeting people, going places, etc. etc. etc. and then suddenly it stalled...  Rather I stalled.

Let's hope I can get unstalled soon. I've started by getting back into shooting things anything, everything. Without practice, there's no perfection.

Mwaaawrriadge

Attended a girlfriend's wedding last night.  It was insanely beautiful and watching those two made me remember how it should be when love happens.  Sure as in life there are always some ups and downs, little - sometimes big - roadblocks that can get in the way, but eventually if it's true and meant to exist, love will overcome all obstacles. 

I really loved being there for her.  And I really loved the fact that I was one of the lucky six that got to hold up and extend a lightsaber as they walked back down the aisle as husband and wife.  Classic.

Determination

Sometimes when you think you can't you just have to push yourself a little bit harder and realize with enough work, effort and determination you can make almost anything happen.

Closure

 

What's that one quote "Parting is such sweet sorrow?"  Adieu.  Adieu.  Adieu. 

***

I'm a little bit lost today.  Not sad... just lost.  After spending a pretty incredible great weekend outdoors I am laying mentally exhausted because of a few unpleasant issues that finally were bought up and out and resolved.  I guess some call it closure.  One would think that having such a thing would encourage and inspire the person receiving such a great gift and honestly in a sense... it does.  But sometimes with closure comes loss.  I lost something that was very special to me  and I wasn't really ready to give it up just yet but as we know all good - and semi-good - and not so great things come to a end eventually one way or another.  

June 1st 2010 will be the start of a new day.  I look forward to it's arrival.  Until then... I'm hiding underneath the covers.  Please do not disturb.

 

Moving On.

This weekend, I moved the last of my stuff to my new apartment at the beach and all ready I feel like a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders.  So glad to be out of M.  I was waiting around for all the wrong reasons... someone else.  Anyways my creative block feels like it's finally gone and I'm looking forward to what comes.  So far it's photography (of course), I've pulled the sewing machine out and the jewelry tools - I've some great ideas that I want to explore - and I'm also continuing with yoga and dance.  Starting to feel like my good old self again. 

Berry Berry Nice.

"The seeds of change are blooming" - Scout Willis

Thank you Universe.  I received your gift today and I appreciate it.

Akeru

~ to end, begin, to expire, to start, to unwrap, to pierce... 

Silence.

Some bridges burn with no signs of smoke or fire.
Be mindful of how you tread for the path to lasting friendship may be a fragile one.
And, the hand that once helped may come but only once.

- JT

Endings.

Be careful when a naked person offers you a shirt. 
~ African Proverb

Supernova Sodapop

What a sad sad way to end two years.

Little Ant

Choose a job you love, and you will never have to work a day in your life.
~ Confucius

Jump

And just like that... he was gone.

Almost two years ago I met the man I thought I was going to marry. A month ago, he decided his path lay elsewhere. Today he let me go.

The disappointment one feels when a partner doesn't share your dreams of the future is heartbreaking.

However... I think he made a good decision, although a very poorly executed one.

Never be down, upset, angry or cry if someone leaves you. Never let them see you sweat. They aren't worth any of the pain or tears if they don't love you. The best thing to do is to accept the new reality and move on.

Why Do We Hurt the One's Who Love Us?

We go through our days and nights alone. Sometimes we are alone by choice and sometimes by chance. Sometimes we are alone physically while sometimes we are alone among people. We yearn to love. We yearn to be loved.

  If love is such an important part of our lives, why do we push it away? Why do we hurt the ones who love us? I know the saying is technically, "Why do we hurt the one's we love," but that's not what I'm talking about here. I'm talking about the time's when we hurt the people who look after us and work for our happiness. Why do we do that?

I think that sometimes we don't realize who loves us and who doesn't. That seems like the easiest answer to me. We don't trust most people and are so wrapped up in our own lives that we don't even realize who is trying to help us and who isn't. Forget about the fact that they love us.

Another reason we may hurt the one's who loves us is because we don't want them to love us. Sometimes we just don't want to, or can't love someone, so we push them away. I think it's silly to say you can't love someone because there is a difference between loving and being in love. Love is a choice, not a feeling. You choose to treat someone well it doesn't just happen. So pushing someone away just seems like an easy way to not have to deal with it.

So why do we hurt them? Is causing pain a way to see how long the person can keep taking hits before giving up? Like a test? I don't know, but if you do that kind of stuff, stop it's not cool. Don't push the people who love you away. If they really love you they may give you some good old tough love and you'll find yourself alone, but maybe that's what you need. Maybe you need to know what it's like to be hurt, so you'll think twice about doing it again next time. Love hurts enough already so don't cause any more pain than already needed.

Jumping Jack Flash

Words Left Unspoken

Venice

I've always wondered which direction I should go in. I've dabbled in this and that but always have been led back to my roots, photography. I begin taking photographs when I was 18 and two months later was published in a teen magazine. My desire was to continue down this path but something happened along the way. A mentor who wasn't enthusiastic enough to push me forward, a offer to travel across country for awhile, a desire to experience the world. But oddly enough... all roads have always led me back to here... my roots. Photography. I'm giving it a good old fashion try this time around. Stay tuned.

This is my friend during our Venice holiday. We're soon to head out to four different countries towards the end of this year. Now that I've a better camera... I can't wait.

Gay Paree

Le temps passe, passe le bien.

A distant ship's smoke on the horizon.

 

Ever want to rewind and start over again?  You could do things that were left undone, say things that were left unsaid, appreciate more, grow more, laugh more, love more.

Part Deux

 

“The single biggest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place.”

- George Bernard Shaw

Singapore Airport

It seems I've had to take a little bit of a different route because the flights out of Bangkok to Japan (to Los Angeles) got booked and now I sit at 2am in a lounge in Singapore where I had to pay about ten bucks to get into. Comfty seats, free internet, massage, facial, I even took a shower. I've a few hours before my flight at 5.50am. The immigration agent wouldn't let me through and told me to go back into the terminal because there was absolutely nothing outside of it, said to collect my bags from the baggage claim in a few hours and head up here. How nice was that? So far... even though I'm at the airport, I'm loving Singapore. It's worth a come back to for sure.

I'll be able to sleep a bit on the next flight, it'll take me six hours to get to Tokyo and then another however many to Los Angeles.  Long route.  If I return I will defn not go standby again.

I can't believe I got to take a shower. Have new clothes and can even sleep if I want to. I'm thinking I'll try to stay awake and sleep on the plane, going on twenty four hours here and a restless night on a train from Southern Thailand to Northern, so if you count that even more. I just don't want to wake up in a state worse than I'm in right now. Kind of zen. Kind of tired but coping well.

The airport is massive. I'm too tired to walk to the other terminals to explore but I just may get a massage on my shoulders, lots of stress and tension there.

Siam

My partner and I have embarked on a most amazing adventure in Thailand.   So far... so great.  I couldn't be happier and could not imagine being any other place than  right here, right now.